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Are you proud of everything on your office computer? Are those items you might not be so eager to display really hidden from the view and scrutiny of others? Alas, for the answer is now unequivocally “no.” Your office PC, thanks to Microsoft’s new Big Brother-style software, may now be considered a weapon loaded with ammunition!

This new software is a lazy, ineffectual office worker’s nightmare, for it is capable of remotely monitoring a worker’s productivity, physical well being and competence. This monitoring system would enable computers to wirelessly pick up on a user’s heart rate, galvanic skin response, brain signals, body temperature, facial movements and expressions, blood pressure, and respiration rate. Previously, this technology was only the headache of pilots, fire fighters and NASA astronauts. This patent from Microsoft marks the very first time a company has proposed such a software for use in mainstream offices.

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